Forget resolutions set actionable goals – Tea Time Tip 18

Forget vague New Year’s Resolutions and instead set yourself SMARTER goals, action plans and form new habits.

Many people still persist with setting New Year’s resolutions, after all they’re kind of fun, and ‘everyone’ is doing it! But ask yourself, have they ever worked? Do you get to the end of January or June and you’ve already failed dismally? There’s always next year, right? NOOOO

These were weekly live videos on a wide variety of topics streamed on the FAQ Business Training Facebook page, and on Founder Jane Tweedy’s LinkedIn profile. We may bring these back, so keep an eye out!

Forget resolutions, set actionable goals video

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Forget resolutions, set actionable goals transcript

The following transcript includes timestamps so you can scroll down, find the piece of the time of the piece of video you want to watch and then skip ahead to that in the video.

Introduction

Good afternoon. We’re here in the run up to Christmas [Late 2021 – yes an oldie but a goodie]. Thought this is the perfect time to do a bit of a session about goal setting, because obviously a lot of people set New Year’s resolutions at this time of year. And as we know, New Year’s resolutions tend to flunk miserably. So let’s look at how we can change that.

00:20 Goal setting spreadsheet for members only

Those that are in my membership or who purchase this little course later, will get access to a goal setting worksheet that you won’t get by just attending today. But let’s get kicked off. We’re going to forget New Year’s resolutions and we’re going to set actionable goals.

00:37 Tea Time Tips Series explained

Today’s session is part of our Tea Time Tips series. Cheers. And these series are basically just small lunch ‘n’ learn type sessions where we teach you a smaller topic than a full two hour session, and hopefully you’ll learn something that you can apply.

00:53 Disclaimer session is general in nature

And like I said, given it’s, coming up to New Year’s thought this was the perfect time to look at New Year’s resolutions and goal setting. So, disclaimer, the information today is generic in nature. Please just take on what you need to.

01:07 Who is your presenter Jane Tweedy

Who am I? Jane Tweedy. You should know me by now and I am a business advisor, coach and trainer. And I would love to work with you if you need assistance.

01:18 Why don’t vague New Year’s resolutions work?

Why don’t New Year’s resolutions work? They seem like fun, right? They’re all party, party, woo woo. The reason they don’t work is very simple. They are often quite vague. They often do not have a deadline attached. They definitely don’t have a plan attached. And they can be a little bit negatively worded. We’ll look at that soon.

But on the positive for New Year’s resolutions. Often we let others know that we’re doing them, so they may be written, and they may also be shared with others, often on our socials.

01:51 New Year’s resolutions are often vague

What do I mean by vague? What do you say if you say something like, I’m going to sleep more in 2022? Well what does that mean? Does that mean in this situation of falling asleep at your desk? Does that count? Because technically you’re asleep?

Well, no, probably not what we meant by falling asleep at a desk that doesn’t count for sleeping more. You could sleep for 1 second more a day, and technically you would be sleeping more. Again, not really a genuine result for what you probably wanted to achieve. So it doesn’t really have any relevancy or any purpose. So that is where we go mmm, yeah, they don’t work so well when it’s too vague.

02:33 New Year’s resolutions often have no deadlines or timeframes

The second one is they typically don’t have a deadline. So resolutions no deadlines. Doesn’t indicate when you might start it, when you might finish it. Is this a one off thing that you’re going to do? So you are going to be healthy and fit… for a whole week, or is it something that you’re going to do ongoing? So we need to be clear about what our deadline is.

02:53 New Year’s resolutions have no plan attached

It needs to have a plan attached. So if you’re actually going to achieve something, you need to actually break it down, particularly if it’s big. And we’ll talk about really big goals soon. But big goals, especially can be quite overwhelming. So if we see this mountain in front of us, it’s like, how do we attack that?

For a start, we’ve got to get to Switzerland. How do we get to Switzerland? Do we have to save money? So there can be lots of parts to the process which we need to deal with. There’s no clear plan of getting there. And if there’s no clear plan to get there, we probably won’t get there.

03:26 Often not clear how to get started

And it also doesn’t cover what can we do today? So if I want to go to Switzerland and climb the mountain here, what can I do today to work towards achieving that in the future? So that is what we mean by a plan.

03:40 Watch your wording

And the last one is watching the wording. For instance, a lot of people will say something like, I’m going to lose weight, I’m going to lose ten kilos. But we associate the word lost with needing to find something. So therefore, if we lose ten kilos, you can pretty much bet we’re going to find ten kilos later. So we try not to use that type of terminology.

04:05 Focus on positive outcomes

Instead, we’re going to focus on positive outcomes. For instance, I want to do X by Y to feel Z. And you can also add the action plan stuff into the goal. But typically I would do that as a separate part, and we’ll look at why that is later.

But here’s an example. I want to fit into my “skinny jeans” (whatever they may be) by 30 April 2022 to feel good in my clothes and boost my self-confidence. So we’ve been clear about why we want to do it, why we chose that outcome. And it is outcome based.

04:43 A goal without a plan is a wish or a dream

And remember, the key thing with resolutions and why they don’t work is a goal without a plan is just a wish or a dream. And when it’s not even a goal, when it’s just a resolution, it’s really vague. You’re even more unlikely to succeed.

05:00 Convert your New Year’s resolutions to actionable goals

So how do we convert that resolution idea into an actionable goal? Well, SMARTER goals. I’m sure you’ve heard of SMART goals – specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound. There can be variations of this. Some people will say attainable. Sometimes the A and the R and that gets switched around, but that’s okay. They are SMART, and most people get what that means. But when they actually try to put it in place, they find that you’re not doing a very good job of it.

05:31 The ER addition to SMART goal setting

So Evaluate and Readjust is the ER part of SMARTER. And that just reminds us that a goal is not set in stone. So think of goal posts not as the ones that you would find on a rugby field, that are firmly in the ground, but rather ones that you’d find on a school soccer pitch, that can be moved. They’re pretty heavy. They don’t move easily, but they can be moved around if required.

05:55 What will it look like if I achieve this goal?

So that is the evaluation and readjustment part. And when we’ve set our goals, when we’ve set our SMART goals, a question we need to stop and ask ourselves is, does it really achieve what I want out of it, or, what does it look like if I achieve that? And if we ask one of those questions, it will usually prod us into going, mmm maybe the goal’s not quite right, and that’s where we can make changes.

06:23 Is the goal really SMART?

So the first thing is, is it really SMART? If I set a goal, I will go to the gym three times a week in 2021. That might have sounded at the time, at the start of the year, quite specific. I’ve specified the amount of times, I’ve specified the time frame. I’ve specified that I’m going to the gym.

06:43 Specific, measurable, achievable

I’ve been quite specific. It’s got a measure in there. I’ve said I’m going three times a week during the year. Is it achievable? In my personal situation probably not, but for some people, that’s definitely an achievable aim.

06:58 Relevant and time-bound

Is it relevant? Clearly need to lose a bit of weight. So, yeah, I’m sure that’s a bit relevant for me. And it’s time-bound. Yes. So if we look at that on the face value, you might go, yeah, that’s SMART. It really isn’t SMART. Why not?

07:14 BUT what does it achieve?

Because if we ask that question, what does it actually achieve for you, then we might find that it doesn’t actually achieve what we want. Now, first of all, going to the gym – “I will go to the gym”. Kind of sounds specific, but it actually achieves nothing, because really, it’s just a tick to say I went to the gym. Because think about what are you doing at the gym?

07:37 So be really careful that you’re not just trying to tick a box

If you go to the gym and buy coffee and walk out the door, technically, you went to the gym. You didn’t do any gym work, any healthy fitness stuff. But you technically went to the gym. You could go and use the weights machine there and do two pull downs. And then, yeah, I’m done for today. I’ve been to the gym, ticked my box. So be really careful that you’re not just trying to tick a box, because that is not going to get you anywhere.

08:03 What was your real intention?

It also doesn’t achieve what you really wanted it to achieve. So maybe what your real intention for going to the gym was, was saying I want to be able to go hike a particular trail. I need to get fitter and healthier so that I can do that comfortably. So that might have been the intention.

Going to the gym actually had nothing to do with it. So be careful about what you’re actually tying it to. And the reason I use this particular example is because of what happened in 2021 and Covid obviously happened to many of us.

08:33 Does the goal need to be tied to something closely?

And in Australia, particularly, and in New Zealand, the gyms were shut down. So when the gyms were shut down, some of your goal’s out the water because you can’t meet your goal, the gym is shut. Whereas if we were trying to get fit and healthy, it did not need to be tied to the gym at all.

08:50 What if there is no obvious measure?

Another one you can look at is when there is no scale. Say for instance, I want to be happier in three months, is the goal that you want to set.

08:59. Create a scale

Now, at the moment, that’s too vague, and it’s too general. But what we can do is we can actually turn that into an achievable proper SMART goal. The way that we do that is by using a scale. And what we have is a scale from one to ten. There’s actually a psychological reason why we don’t use a zero.

09:19 What does a 1 and 10 look like?

So you can look up some psychology information if you want to know why we do that. But we start from one to ten. Because at one there’s still kind of a worse place to be. So I want to be happier in three months. What we do basically is we set our one and our ten. So what does a one look like to us?

So one means that we’re depressed, we’re upset, we don’t want to leave the house. Whatever. That’s the extreme of a one. So that’s your one. A ten on the other end is where you are happy every day, you’re joy, joy always, you know, bubbly and happy and everything is going right and nothing’s going wrong. Now, clearly, ten is not really practical. We’re not seeking perfection. Okay. We’re seeking progression.

10:04 Set your current and desired levels

Now, what you’ve got to do to make this actually work for you, is you need to set, okay, we’ve set up what our one and our ten is. Now we need to set what’s our current average level. So we say currently averagely, we are a four. More days than not, we’re feeling a bit anxious and a bit depressed and a bit sad. But we want to target a seven. So more days than not, we are happy.

10:29 Word into a SMARTER goal

Now you can set specific things around those what that means. But you can actually set what those scales are. And then what you’re doing is you’re basically saying to make it a SMART goal, I want to be happier in three months, so by 31 March 2022, by moving from a four to a seven on our happiness scale. And that has actually turned something that was vague and general and had no measure, to something we can measure.

10:57 Work out how you will monitor – could be a daily journal

And over time what we can do is we can do things like set a little journal up and we can record each day where we’re at on our happiness scale.

So we can say right today I’m a three. Today, I’m a five. Today I’m a two, today I’m a seven. But we can then actually map our journey over time. So that’s what you can do when you do not have an obvious measure to measure against.

11:19 How do you eat an elephant?

Now, how do you eat an elephant? Sure, you’ve all heard this joke before. One bite at a time. So that’s what you’ve got to remember. When you’re setting goals, you’ve got to break it down into the one bite at a time. Otherwise, it seems too big. And this is especially important when you have what we call the WAG or the BHAG.

11:41 Set a WAG or a BHAG – a big longer term goal

You may or may not have heard of these terms. But a WAG is a wildly audacious goal. So the goal that’s way out there, a huge goal. Or, it’s a BHAG, a big hairy audacious goal. Either way, these are the big, big goals. They’re a little bit scary. They may take, say, three years to achieve, which is why it’s really important that we actually break it down to smaller parts.

12:06 Set sub-goals for your WAG or BHAG

These are your life game changers. These are the things that are going to make a difference and leave a legacy in the world. So these are really important, and you’ve got to break them down. Because if we set a monumental goal, this huge goal, a WAG or a BHAG in the future, and then we do nothing. Obviously, as we get closer and closer to that date, I’m not going to have achieved it. Whereas if I’ve set little goals along the way, little milestones, I’m far more likely to have achieved it.

12:35 Set action plans by chunking down goals to tasks

So make sure that we’re setting action plans for all of our goals. Break down your goal into chunks, and you can have sub-goals, particularly for the WAG and the BHAG. Some of your smaller goals. You absolutely wouldn’t need a sub-goal, but you certainly want to have chunked down tasks.

12:53 5 – 10 minute tasks

Each task ideally, break it down as far as even as five or ten minute tasks, because there’s no way we can justify us not doing a task when it’s only five or ten minutes.

Like if it’s five or ten minutes and we have the capability of doing it, then what’s stopping us? And if there is something still stopping us, then we’ve really got to look at other issues, like limiting beliefs and things.

13:16 Some tasks you could do immediately

So make sure that those five or ten minute tasks include some tasks that you can actually knock off immediately. Things that you could just use to get your momentum going. And then once you’ve done those, that leads to more tasks that can be done, and then that builds up over time.

13:32 How do we increase our chances of hitting our goals?

How do we increase the chances of success? We’ve said, okay, we don’t do vague resolutions without deadlines. We do goals that are SMART, and we do the evaluate and readjust, and then we set action plans and things as well. But how do we increase the chance of success? Because we all know that we still fail at goals. Well, how do we increase the chances?

13:53 Make sure they’re SMARTER written and visible goals

First of all, make sure it is genuinely SMARTER. So go through that bit of a test of asking that question, what does it look like when I achieve that goal? Make sure it’s SMART. Write it down. Stick it in front of you, so stick it in front of you, in front of your computer. Use it as your screen saver. Stick it as your background or wallpaper on your phone.

Put it somewhere so you see it every single day. Put it on your mirror, in your bathroom, whatever. But also remember to evaluate and readjust. But just because we set a goal does not mean we’re going to achieve it, but it also doesn’t mean it was actually the right goal in the first place.

14:29 Remember to evaluate and readjust your goals if needed

Maybe we worked out, for instance, that we’d set that goal about going to the gym. Then we worked out that wasn’t really our goal in the first place, so we need to change it. So remember to do the evaluate and readjust phase.

14:42 Tell others about it

Tell others about it. A great way of achieving your goals is to let other people know what they are. Because if they know, then they can keep you accountable. They can help egg you on and things. And a good way to do it if you, for instance, are a business, is to actually stick it on your business page. And that way you can do a regular update.

15:01 Provide updates on them regularly

You could do a monthly update. Again, it gives you content. It’s just another way of communicating with people. And make sure you share not just your successes, but also your flops as well. Because people like it when people are keeping it real. So please make sure you do that.

15:17 Get a goal buddy

You could do your goal with somebody else. So don’t just set a goal to go to the gym and lose weight and all that stuff, but word it in a much better way.

Have a gym buddy, have somebody that’s going to get fit and healthy with you. If you’re in business and it’s a business goal, set a mastermind group up. Have people that are going to be on your side are going to cheer you on. That are going to help you push through those challenges and the fears.

What about family? Maybe if it’s a personal goal, family would be a great support or a friend. Whether they’re a business friend or just a friend friend, get this person to do it with you, and maybe you’ll both achieve something more than you might have achieved alone.

16:01 Establish great habits

Work on establishing really good habits. So one really good habit is not to go on your phone in bed first thing in the morning. Instead, get up and do something towards that goal every single day. That way you’re starting the day on a high. You’re already working towards your goals.

16:16 Make goal tasks priority

Prioritise it into your day. So make sure that you are actually doing that goal, saying, I’m going to do three goals tasks today and get them done.

16:25 Book – Tiny Habits by  BJ Fogg

There’s a great book called Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg but BJ Fogg talks about three things. He talks about motivation, ability and prompt. And he says that there’s much more to it than just the why. The why is great, but the why is not enough to get you through.

16:45 Ability matters too

He said you also have to have the ability to do something. Like for instance, going to the gym when the gyms are shut, you don’t have the ability to do that. Or it could be learning something you might say, I’m going to get better at social media. Again, you’ll need to set a scale for that or set followers or something as your numbers. But do you need to go to some courses to learn how to do that?

17:09 Prompts are reminders

And the last one is prompt. And they give a really good example on this, where he says things like if you’re going to start getting fitter by doing press ups. Instead of starting press ups because he talks about tiny habits, instead of starting press ups on the floor, start pushups or press ups on the wall.

17:29 You’re implementing tiny habits

And as a prompt, every time you go to the toilet, two press ups against the wall. Because anyone can do that. And the thing is, it doesn’t put you off, because it’s so tiny. And then, of course, because it is so tiny. You go to the next time and you go, I’m not going to do two. it’s silly. I’m going to do four, then I’m going to do six, then I’m going to do eight.

Well, actually, now I’m going to do one on the floor, and so you’re going to change it over time. So that prompt reminds you to do it. And if you have something like going to the toilet, then you’re going to do it multiple times a day. So that’s a really good way to do it. So motivation, ability, prompts. So really think about that and have a look at that book, Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg.

18:10 What you will learn podcast

And there was a great 20 minute podcast on that, that sort of linked by ‘What you will learn’ with Adam and Adam. And that’s where I found out about it. It was really cool. I really thought the concept of that is great. Because who can’t do something really simple? We can all do something tiny.

18:27 An alternative HABIT plan

If you want to do a different form of habit planning. So remember to form a habit, you’ve got to do something consecutively over and over and over again. And there’s different numbers I’ve seen about how many days to form an actual habit. Some say 21 days, non-stop. Some say 60. Some say 90.

I’ve seen all sorts of numbers bandied about. So I’m not going to give you an exact number. And I really think it depends on the scenario as to how long you need to do something for it to stick around.

18:54 Have a plan!

So to form a habit plan, you need to have a plan. Good starting point!

19:00 Attach reward and punishment

Number two, attach a reward or a punishment to it. So you see here we’re dangling the carrot. So what is the reward or the punishment? So what are you going to work towards? Now obviously, if it’s something to do with health, don’t set yourself a goal, probably where it being a reward is a meal or a chocolate bar. Ideally set the reward as something like a massage, so something that genuinely rewards you.

19:24 Different habits are easier to embed than others

So Janet says she’s heard of 40 days, agree, it just takes time. And I totally agree with you, Janet. Everyone’s different. And I think some things just form a new habit quickly, particularly if it’s a really favourable habit. If it’s something that’s working really well for you and you’re getting really good results, you’re going to keep doing it right? Because you’re getting that endorphin flow and that adrenaline rush. But if it’s something that’s kind of a bit of a challenge, then obviously it’s probably going to take longer for it to sync in.

And also it becomes a case of, are you replacing a bad habit with a good one? Or is this a brand new habit from scratch? I think that affects the time as well.

20:01 Be accountable

So be accountable. Don’t make up excuses. If we make excuses, we don’t get results.

20:08 Identify your why

Identify your why, so do know what your motivation is. And if we do have a really good motivation that can help us when times get tough. But going back to tiny habits, ability and prompt are still really good helpers to get us through that motivation, when the motivation is just not quite enough.

20:26 Take action EVERYDAY

And take action towards your goals every single day. And that’s why doing that little five minute task in the morning or whatever, is a great way to get you through.

20:36 Consider a vision board

Another thing to consider is to have a vision board. So vision boards can really help you visualise your future, and you can put this visible to you every day. So I actually have this one on the background of my monitors.

20:50 Helps to trigger the RAS

And that way I see this every single day I come onto my computer. And it helps me to remember what I’ve been trying to do this year. So it helps to trigger also the reticular activating system or the RAS in the brain.

And it means that if I keep seeing pictures like a Castlepoint, for instance, every day, I’m going to keep remembering, I really want to get over to New Zealand, but obviously I’ve been realistic and I know that it’s just not possible at the moment. I hear they’ve restricted things again even further. So some things are outside our control, but it’s still going to be there. And that’s why I have again on here travel again when able, because I’m not able at the moment.

21:30 My visions are coming to life

But I can still do lots of other things instead. And that’s why this year I have launched my online school. I have started my podcast. I have started doing the HBDI® profiles. So these are all things that have come off. I’ve hired my new assistant, bottom right there. Those are the things that I’m doing that are for me and part of my goals and visions.

21:51 Take time to reflect

So always reflect. If things didn’t work, why or why did they not work? Look back on it. Was it the right goal? Did you have a clear enough why or relevancy? So make sure you do that.

22:03 Take that first step

And also remember a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. So sometimes we just need to make that first step. And once we started, we can build on that.

22:16 Did you fall off the wagon?

And to finish off, did you fall off the wagon? This happens to all of us, right? We’re on a good path, and then suddenly we fall off. And I was talking to my partner about this the other day. He wasn’t feeling so well the other day. So he didn’t go to the gym. And then he didn’t go to the gym the next day. And then he hasn’t gone the next day.

So now it’s gone three days no gym. So the thing is now, does that mean you just kind of give up? It’s too hard now. No, a setback does not need to derail you.

22:48 New day, fresh start

So each day ends, another begins. Just start over. Okay, start afresh. Sure, we might have to work towards establishing that habit again. But hey, we can still get there. And that’s what we’ve got to focus on. Look at the end game.

23:03 Set actionable goals not resolutions

So make sure to get things going this year. Don’t just set these resolutions. Set rough resolutions or goals. Great, start with those, but then prioritise them and decide how to make them SMART – specific measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound.

Create action plans around your goals. Make sure that you evaluate and readjust. So if it’s not the right thing, you can change, you don’t have to keep it the same. And then focus on those tasks to get successful implementation.

23:38 Reach out if you need assistance

If you do need assistance with doing any of this, you can reach out to me. If you’re in New South Wales, I am a Business Connect Advisor. You can reach out to me for potentially no cost under that program, or a very low cost. There is also a lot of courses and online training available through my online school at faqbusinesstraining.com and I provide group training for networking groups and businesses and things. So do reach out if you want any help.

24:03 Thanks for tuning in, have a great break

So thank you so much for tuning in today. I didn’t expect to get many people on today, given we are so close to the end of the year, but I thought I just want to do this one to wrap up the end of the year. And that way, if you are having a break over Christmas, then have a break.

24:16 Ditch those New Year’s resolutions!

But then if you are setting resolutions, please turn them into SMART goals and action plans. Because, that way you’ll get to the end of next year and you’ve actually achieved something instead of going, okay, I’m going to start the year with weight loss or whatever on my plan again, when we’ve done it for the past ten years without fail, and failed every time.

24:42 Don’t repeat the same mistakes!

So it doesn’t work. So why repeat the same mistakes over and over? So hopefully this has given you some insights into ways that you can make sure that you get better results.

24:52 Signing off from a hot Western Sydney!

As you will see, I am literally melting here. It is only 30 degrees in my office at the moment, so I’m going to go jump in the pool and cool off. So have a fantastic Christmas and New Year break, and I look forward to seeing you in 2022. Bye bye.

Today’s Tea Time tip featured our host Jane Tweedy. Her details are as follows: 

Jane is a Professional Certified Coach with International Coaching Federation (PCC with ICF), business advisor and trainer. She loves working with growing small to medium business owners who are doing the right thing, to help them do it right! Currently, Jane offers at least 50 live sessions a year to train small business owners.

Jane offers a variety of services to clients and her online school and membership site will be available before the end of 2021. Jane’s focus going forward is building the membership and offering implementable small group training – something she finds is often the missing link.

If you are interested in training, speaking, or anything else Jane has to offer, please connect via training@faqbusiness.com.au or via the contact forms on our websites.

Interested in coaching? Check out Jane’s coaching services.

faqbusinesstraining.com.au – our main site with a great blog

faqbusinesstraining.com – our new online school

faqbusinesspodcast.com.au – our FAQ Business Podcast site

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